Happy Halloween!

I really don't know if people actually are going out tonight.  It seems like Halloween has become this two weekend event.  More time for girls to really slut out.  On Friday and Saturday, people were already dressing up and going to Halloween parties.  So it's Monday and I imagine people are partied out, and their costumes are probably all dirty and ripped up anyway.

I didn't dress up this year.  But I did meet my BFF in Los Angeles to do Halloween type stuff.  I took the amtrak up there.  Except, they are doing weekend maintenance on the track, so I had to ride a charter bus up to Irvine.  The bus driver was a boisterous ample african american woman.  This man tried to get on the bus as it was pulling away.  He didn't have a ticket though.  She gave him the bizness.  But, she made it there in like 1 hour and fifteen minutes.

After that, I took the train the rest of the way to LA.  They were only operating on one track, but I had read the signs that said the train to LA was on track 1.  So I was climbing the stairs to go over there, with one other guy, when someone yelled at us that the train was on track 2.  The whole hour that I waited, people would go over to track 1, and someone would have to yell to them to come back.  If I worked there, I would have just put a sign on the stairs and the elevator, right?

So, I got to LA and my BFF didn't see me waiting, so she parked for like 3 minutes and had to pay $2.  Sounds like LA to me.  We went all the way to our hotel room which was a priceline bargain by LAX, and we were told we couldn't check in until 3.  Which meant we wouldn't be checking in until later that night.

So, we went over to Melrose near the tattoo shop.  We had lunch, went to some stores that my BFF liked, which included a necromantic store, called Necromance.  It had taxidermy and all kinds of preserved insects and animal bones and skeletons.  One thing that was a little disturbing was a box of stuffed ducklings for sale.  Poor little guys.  There was a lot of stuff.  And there was a sign in front of a myriad of mostly animal bones that said that all insects procured had died a natural death.  I don't believe it.  But whatever.  It was a very cool store.  Of course, photography wasn't allowed, so no pictures.

We went to the tattoo shop about half an hour before our appointment.  They weren't ultra helpful.  They asked who the appointment was with, but we didn't know.  So they guessed it was Jonny, wasn't in yet.  So we waited and waited.  And waited.  He called about half an hour after he was supposed to be there.  He was running late.  So, the guy who seemed to be the manager or owner talked to us about what we wanted.  So, he told me Jonny would be definitely the best for my tattoo.  He thought that Sean would be good to do BFF's tattoo because it was more up his alley.

So, we waited.  There wasn't too much in the immediate vicinity, so we mostly waited at the shop.  Sean showed up, and he was told about BFF's tattoo.  He was busy eating his subway sub, so he took his time.  Then he had to set up his station.  Then finally he was ready for her.  About 2 hours after we had first arrived.  He did a crow on her foot, and he added chains to an anchor on her thigh.  And he hit on her while he was tattooing her.  She was interested.  Which was good.  Otherwise, that would be an uncomfortable experience.  Being hit on my some guy who you don't like but is permanently embedding ink in your skin.

So, when he was halfway done with her, Jonny Ocean showed up.  But he had to do a microdermal jewel thing to this girl first, behind her ear.  So that took a while.  While he was doing that, the apprentice was supposed to prep the tattoo station for him, but the apprentice seemed new or not too smart.  It took him a long time, and then he didn't do everything.  Finally, Jonny was ready for me.  I showed him my little file printout of a  sampaguita flower from the internet.  It was to go by my mom's name.  I wanted something little, but he thought it should be big.  He asked me to write down the name, then he looked on the internet for other photos.  He picked another one, and printed it big and in color.

Then he used the photo to sketchy the outlines on my skin.  He asked me what I thought.  I looked.  It was big.  I wasn't thinking that big.  But what the hell.  He was the artist, right?  So I gave him the okay.  And I watched him pull out the neat blending needle with several fine teeth, like clippers kinda. So he drew all over my arm.  I really don't know how long it took.  Maybe around an hour.  But after all that waiting, I totally wanted him to take his time and make it worth my wait.  After all, this was permanent.  When he was done, it was very red, but I could still see the detail.  Definitely worth the wait.

So, this isn't the best picture.  But don't worry it's beautiful.  I'm so gangsta.  So here's the info for the place.

Sacred Art LA41 N. Highland Ave
Sacred Art Tattoo & Piercing
1441 N. Highland Ave
Hollywood CA 90028
323-463-0520

Facebook: sacredartla

Hours of Operations:
Sunday - Thursday 12noon to 10pm
Friday - Saturday 12noon to 12pm
Hollywood CA 90028
323-463-0520

Facebook: sacredartla

Hours of Operations: 
Sunday - Thursday 12noon to 10pm
Friday - Saturday 12noon to 12pm

FYI - TFH is out of the office.

So, I will not be able to post the next two days.  I apologize, but I am going to LA to hang out with my lifelong BFF one more time on the west coast before we move.  : )  and :(   If we had 2 computers or I had an ipad or something, then I would be posting.  Unfortunately, at this time, all I have is a shitty tween phone that I will be barely able to check my email on.

So, here I am writing a post to tie you over for two days.  Unfortunately, I got nothing.

I'm sitting here feeling pretty geeky.  Friday night.  In my sweats.  Sitting at the computer blogging.  Eating yogurt and granola.  Eating at the computer is so....depressing to me.  But, I need to get this blog post done, and I need to eat something before I start to get the dizzy shakes, so there you have it.  I know, you're probably saying, I eat at the computer all the time.  Yeah, yeah.

Since we got this fancy computer, I am very anal about eating and drinking while on it.  Never put a drink or food directly next to it.  Never.  And don't eat or drink over it.  That's just stupid.

I spent quite a bit of time gently cleaning the computer yesterday.  The palm rest, the track pad, and the area around the power button were especially dirty.  The FP tends to have dirty hands.  When we first got this thing, he always washed his hands before he got on it.  Not so much now....

So, I was sitting at the computer with my granola and yogurt stationed a foot away, but I would turn away from the computer to eat.  And now I'm done eating.

My lips are all chapped because I didn't drink water for 2 hours earlier this evening.  Seriously.  I dropped the FP off at band practice.  I went to Staples to buy bubble wrap and a colored ink cartridge.  Then I went to Mitsuwa to see if there was anything new and cute in the gift store.  There was.  Cool new fancy Hello Kitty purses.  I didn't buy anything, but I was in there for a good 20 minutes.  It was confusing, because there was a line by the last aisle.  It looked like it was the line to the checkout counters, but then it seemed like the line to get the discount end of the night sushi.  I didn't really understand.  But it was a long ass line.  Then I went in to Ross just to see if they had any plain black skirts or cool dresses.  Nope.

Then I went to Albertson's to get some snacks for my trip.  I am mortally afraid of being stuck on the bus (the amtrak isn't running from Irvine to San Diego on the weekends due to maintenance, so there's a bus instead) starving and feeling weak and passing out on a stranger's arm.  And I also hate going back to a hotel late at night and being hungry, but there's nothing to eat but stale vending machine chips or overpriced chips from the front desk.  So I got a few granola bars.

So, I had some water in the car, but I had trouble getting the cap off while I was driving.  And I only thought about drinking when I was driving, of course.  So I had one sip of water in those 2 hours.  And then I got home and was doing stuff, so really, I didn't drink much water for 3 hours.  And now all this talk about being thirsty is making me thirsty.

Oh, and it's making me not think straight.  So, I went to grab a spare house key, so that I had it on me. The FP is taking me to the train station, so he will have the keys, but you never know when you need a  key just in case.  So, when I was looking at the keys on the hooks, I noticed the old car keys were not there.  So I looked in the usual places.  We haven't used that key in months.  Then I remembered when I noticed that somehow, sometime, someone tried to steal the car.  I could only guess that the alarm wasn't set, and someone tried to dismantle the alarm.  The panel that was there seems to be missing.  Well, it is missing.  So, we have no idea where or when this happened.  I think I only noticed because I felt the wires touch the top of my foot.  So, anyway, I began to think that maybe someone got in the house somehow, and took the car key and tried to steal it.  Really.  That's what I thought.  And I tried to think how this could have happened.  Like the door would was unlocked and someone snuck in when we were home?  But it's a tiny apartment.  I would notice someone coming in.  And I thought, did we have those keys and drop them outside?

Then I looked on the floor under this plastic bin.  And there the key was.  Duh.  Stupid me.  I tend to not think straight when preparing for a trip.  And it doesn't matter how long or short the trip.  I just get crazy because I start thinking of things that could go wrong.  I mean, a lot could go wrong on a trip.  A lot could go wrong as I sit here at the computer.  That's just the way my mind works.  Yeah, there's therapy and drugs.  But I don't got insurance for that kind of head shrinking stuff.  And if I'm functioning, I probably wouldn't bother too much anyway.  Oh, I suppose, sometimes it would be good to have someone to turn to.  But I would hate to have a regular thing.

I hate appointments.  I hate waiting until that exact time of an appointment.  And I hate being late to an appointment, even a minute.  I hate walking in to an appointment at exactly the appointed time.  And I hate waiting on someone who is late for an appointment.

Oh, and here's another thing that just happened to me.  I was in the bathroom gathering things for the trip.  I bent down to reach a cabinet, and something in my knee snapped.  Like it got bent the wrong way.  From squatting.  And it was so painful.  At first I thought my knee was fucked.  I hobbled back to the computer chair and put my knee up on the ottoman.  So I sat here for a couple minutes.  Then I tested the knee.  It was tender, but not nearly as painful as it was.  But now, I am walking very gingerly on it.  I think I should ice it.  I hope it's better tomorrow!

So, there you have a little peek into my psyche.  I guess all this blog is, is a dive and a swim around into my psyche.  Yuck.  That sounds gross and uncomfortable.  Ewww.  I feel sorry for you!

Regression

So, I'm interested to see what the deal is with this new series called "Beavis and Butthead".  Sounds intriguing.  I'm intrigued.

Seriously, are they wearing the same clothes?  Are they still in the 90s, will this be addressed in the show or will they be even more anachronistic than they were back in the day?

I can't wait 3 hours!  This is one of those times that I envy those of you on the east coast, yet, I will be in that time zone soon enough.

I can't take it.  Big Bang Theory, Community, Jersey Shore and Beavis and Butthead all on the same night?  Too much amusement for a Thursday.  I'm going to wake up tomorrow with a hundred new laugh lines.

Can I tell you a secret?  Oh, it's not a secret, I think I've rambled on about this before.  I have a crush on Sheldon Cooper.  He's so fuckin funny!  Really.  And I love his wardrobe.  Quirky colorful t shirts over different colored long sleeve t shirts.  I am a big fan of solid print long sleeve t shirts.  So, anyway, I have 4 TV crushes that I can think of right at this moment.

Sheldon Cooper
Joel McHale
Jeff Winger
Abed Nadir

So, 2 of them are the same person, I realize this.  So, he's the pretty boy smart ass who just makes fun of everyone.  Those are entertaining qualities.  Even though really, am I really in love with the writers?  And why didn't I become a sitcom writer?

So, the other 2 have these robotlike qualities.  They have inability to relate to others, to feel empathy, yet at the same time they are brutally honest.  Hilarious.  I love when people blurt out funny mean things because they are tactless.

Don't worry, the FP is aware of this.  He has had his own girlfriends - Nancy Grace, Chelsea Handler, the landlady.  We have this kind of open relationship, I guess.  He can have his pretend celebrity girlfriends and I can have my TV character boy toys.  Is there a TV watchers anonymous?  Because I seriously think I need to go to that.  I am pretty sure I've seen every That 70s Show and Seinfeld.  I've almost seen all of the old Always Sunny In Philadelphia.  I am definitely on the way to seeing every episode of Big Bang Theory.  I think I will have accomplished that by the time I leave.  So, I guess, there are some things I have accomplished with my time off work!

It kind of reminds me of summers when I was in elementary school or junior high.  Whenever I did have chores or torture work or have a friend over, I just sprawled out on the carpet in front of the TV all day.  Sad, but true.  I needed TV to escape from my horrible childhood.  Also in college, my friend and I would watch soap operas and shit like that all day long.  And chain smoke.  And alternate eating at different fast food chains.  Gross.  I'm not quite that bad now.  Oh well, hopefully I'll be back in the working class again soon.  I gotta make the most of this time.  I don't really watch The Office that much, but it is a Halloween episode.....

why I hate making groceries

So, I'm feeling under the weather, and I'm convinced it's from Sunday.  We were at the South Park Abbey for hours watching football.  The chef had fired up the BBQ with lots of lighter fluid and lots of smoke.  Lots and lots of smoke.  Usually we sit at the bar, but our friends met us there, so we sat at a high table behind the bar, close to the door to the patio where the smoker was.  I know I always say how we don't have friends, but we are leaving in less than three weeks, so now is the crunch time to spend quality time with the few friends we do have.  Did I mention we were there for hours?  I'm aging.  If we had been at a bar with backless bar stools, or worse yet, we would have had to stand for 5 or 6 hours, I wouldn't have been able to endure it.  Anyway, the point is, I was inhaling all that damn smoke.  So, my chest has been feeling tighter than usual, and I felt rundown.  On Monday night and Tuesday, I had that icky brillo pad in my throat feeling.  Today, I just feel light headed and like I have to sit up straight to breathe properly.

All that setup to tell you about my trip to the store.  So, I basically wanted some tea and yogurt.  So, I went to the store.  Being kind of under the weather, I definitely didn't want to go, but I wanted that tea to break up the tightness in my chest.

So, I am a horrible shopper.  I will stand in front of the dish soap for way too long trying to pick one.  Luckily, the FP had asked for Dawn.  However, there are so many different "flavors" that it was a little overwhelming.  If this dish soap were for me, I probably would have bought the homelife brand.  But, I bought the Dawn.  They were all the same price, so that part was easy.  I ended up with the "overnight soaking power" flavor.  Occasionally there are pots that are like several night soakers.  Which reminded me, there was a dutch oven (he he) sitting with water in it for days!  So, I took a break from writing this to clean it out and oil it and put it in the oven to season it.

Anyhoo, getting back to why I don't like grocerying.  I hate people like me who are indecisive.  And worse, I hate people like me who are wandering around clueless, taking their time, blocking the aisles. But maybe even worse are the people who are chatting on their phone, slowly walking down the middle of the aisle so no one can go around them.  And the people who slowly walk to the check out in a way that you can't get around them, so that they beat you there.  Oh, and then the people who wait in the self check line, and they won't go to an open register if the light above it is not on, when clearly the register looks to be functioning properly.  Those people are really annoying, but I don't always say anything, because I know I'm going to say it in a nasty way.

And I hate when a certain item doesn't have a proper upc code, and even though I know how much something is, the cashier makes some bag person do a price check anyway.

Anyway, I got my tea and my yogurt, and I also got some of that bulk "trail mix" from the organic aisle.  It's dumb, but I trick myself into believing that the trail mix with the dried fruit, nuts, chocolate, yogurt covered raisins, yogurt covered peanuts and yogurt covered banana chips are healthier than candy bars.  Well, some of it is candy!  But, it so much more satisfying to eat a few handfuls of trail mix than to eat a homogenous candy bar.  I like variety.  In large quantities.  The trail mix made the trip worth all the annoyance.

So, anyway, I will end by promoting my food blog.  Here is my second Newman's Own blog with a cooking demo video.  Watch it, damnit!  I spent hours on this thing, and it's not like I'm getting paid for it.  Okay, well, I did get free tomato sauce and a free video camera....

doomsday for google adsense

So, I got the official email.  I got the boot.

Google Adsense ad serving has been disabled to your site

This message was sent from a notification-only email address that does not
accept incoming email. Please do not reply to this message.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello,

During a recent review of your account we found that you are currently
displaying Google ads in a manner that is not compliant with our program
policies
(https://www.google.com/support/adsense/bin/answer.py?answer=48182&stc=aspe-1pp-en).

--------------------------------------------------
EXAMPLE PAGE:
http://unnecessarysupplement.blogspot.com/2011/10/gas-chamber.html

Please note that this URL is an example and that the same violations may
exist on other pages of this website or other sites in your network.

VIOLATION(S) FOUND:

ADULT/EXPLICIT TEXT: As stated in our program policies, AdSense publishers
are not permitted to place Google ads on pages with adult or mature
content, including sexually explicit text. More information about this
policy can be found in our help center (
https://www.google.com/adsense/support/as/bin/answer.py?hl=en&answer=105957
).

ACTION TAKEN: We have disabled ad serving to your site.

ACCOUNT STATUS: ACTIVE
Your AdSense account remains active. However, please note that our team
reserves the right to disable your account at any time. As such, we
encourage you to become familiar with our program policies and monitor
your network accordingly.

Issue ID# 5071711

--------------------------------------------------
Thank you for your cooperation.

Sincerely,

The Google AdSense Team
----------------
For more information regarding this email, please visit our Help Center:
https://www.google.com/adsense/support/bin/answer.py?answer=113058&stc=aspe-ai4-en.

I really needed that money to become independently wealthy by the time I turn 400.  Oh well.  I'm going to be lazy today.  Well, I'm going to neglect this blog because I've been working all day on the food blog.  So, I'm just going to refer you to the food blog rather than write this one.  Is it a flimsy excuse for not writing an independent original post for this blog?  Yes it is.  Oh well, though.  Here's the food blog:

The Pork Porn Pages

Enjoy!  I worked hard on this!

Email Karma

 So, do you ever get emails from strangers, and something about the whole interaction pisses you off?  Well, I do.  I was taught by my dad to fly off the handle at the first mention of any bad news.  I realize that I tend to do this, so, I try to take a step back and assess the situation.  Sometimes, I know I'm being irrational and I take no action before I calm down.  Sometimes, I am just mad and I want to rage, but I try to stop myself.  


So, a little after we had made our decision to move to Florida, I started searching the internets for real estate sites.  I found the site, Trulia, where one can ask questions and people (mainly realtors) can answer.  So, I asked about short term rentals and also about houses for sale as well.  I spelled out my general needs, price range, etc.  I got many responses from realtors wanting to help me.  I emailed them and asked for help finding a short term rental.  One woman answered right away.  She sent me some leads within a couple days.  Most though, said they would look and get back to me.  They never got back to me.  


One realtor in particular struck me with his answer to my question:

Hello, 

I'll be more than happy to assist you in locating the best rental property available for your money. However, the only way I can do this is by first discovering your individual needs. 

1) Do you have children? If so, the quality of the school district you move into may be of some importance. 

2) What criteria shall I include (and/or exclude) when conducting the search of the MLS for your rental? 

3) What is your price range? If I can't find another 2 bedroom, will a 3 bedroom do? Likewise, if there are no condos available, will you consider a single family home? Do you have a pet? 

4) ...and on and on and on. 

The choice is yours. You can work with a random agent who throws properties at you hoping one will stick...or you can work with a qualified Realtor with 8 years experience providing excellent Real Estate services designed specifically for your particular needs. 

I look forward to your call. My direct number is xxx-xxx-xxxx

So, the answer seemed so detailed for a short term rental.  The other thing that got me was his profile picture.  He was holding a little dog, like a rat terrier or something.  So, I figured, someone with a pet would be more understanding and helpful.  I looked at his profile, and this was on it:

Interests:

---------- is interested in seeing an end to animal cruelty, especially on the farm.

So, I'm a sucker for animals.  I wanted this guy to be my realtor.  So I emailed him.  He sent a short reply back, something like, "Sorry, I don't have any rentals at that price range."  It was just like he held the stinky diaper away from his nose as he disposed of it.  Can't be bothered.  So, I emailed him back and asked why he bothered to respond to my question if he couldn't help me.  He replied again, with something like, "what I mean is, I don't have any rentals for that low."  So, obviously, when he answered my question on Trulia, he hadn't actually read it.  He obviously just cut and pasted some generic response to reel suckers in like me!

Fast forward to last week.  At this point, I am really anxious to have a rental lined up before we get there.  I responded to any listing on craigslist that seemed kinda in the ballpark of what we needed.  So, honestly, I got a couple responses, some were not what we needed, so I didn't reply back.  A few days later, I got a very nasty email, regarding a previous one.  So, started the back and forth:

        

Hi, (10/17 - me)

Do you do month to month terms?  And do you allow cats?  I'm looking for a place starting Nov. 18.  

Hi  (10/18 - apt guy)

I will have one apartment available for one month from Nov 18Th, a cat will be OK

If you want a reservation or more information call me tomorrow

          Thanks

         Hi  (10/20 - apt guy)

Wat was the point of asking a Question if you don,t respond back?

         (10/23 - me)

         I apologize for not responding.  You wrote:

"If you want a reservation or more information call me tomorrow"

          I don't want a reservation, so I guess that's why I didn't respond.   I am so used to trying to              contact apartment managers and do not get a response, so I guess I'm doing the same thing, which I shouldn't.    Thanks for the information.  I would be apprehensive to rent from you now because of your belligerent response, we did not even meet yet and it's already started on bad terms.

         Excuses , Excuses, Excuses   (10/23 - apt guy)

            

Serious people call me , i give them the information and then they make the reservation if they want

90% send Emails without responding back like you, So what is the point of sending the Email if you don,t respond, I receive 50-60 Emails per day and 90% of them are like you don,t respond back

OK my Dear Mad Christine, I am sick of you people not responding back 

Thanks and Good Luck Finding your Dream place  

             (10/23 - me)

             Thanks!  I'm excited to find my dream place!  Sorry to waste your time.

So, to put things in perspective, the place looked great from the pictures and the website.  But, he didn't have what I needed, his grammar and spelling were not the best, and I was just following his instructions, as he said nothing about if I did not want to make a reservation!  I should have known from the craigslist ad though, that the guy was a cranky guy.  At the bottom of the listing, it read,

"EMAILS WITHOUT NAMES AND TEL NUMBERS WILL BE DELETED"

So, my bad for even bothering with this one!  I wonder if I had made a sob story about someone being in the hospital or something if he still would have been pissed....probably, his time is very valuable.  But, I think it's more of a case of email karma.

Stinksy Live

So, in light of my revealing post yesterday (oh, and I'm not feeling a good topic) I'm going to do a fluff piece.  I have a bunch of video of Stinksy that I took, that didn't amount to much.  He will do things when I'm not recording, and then later I try to catch him in action, and it's like he's camera shy.

So, here he is, looking at Pete.  Usually, he will bat at the walls of the fish tank, trying to swipe at Pete.  And Pete seems to play along with him, swimming around the tank.  Of course this time, Stinksy decides not to perform.

Here he is, not interested at all in this crab.

Here he is with catnip.  Usually he will sit in the planter, but not this time.

Then here he is hanging out inside the futon.  He has ripped the thing up!  Anyone want a futon?

Pubes

So, maybe about six weeks ago, I was reading a City Beat opinion article about getting grey pubes.  Gray Matters by Enrique Limon.  Hilarious fucking article.  Lo and behold, a week or two later, I notice this long ass grey pube.  On my body.  In my bush.  It was long.  I do clean up and shave so I'm not sporting untamed 70s bush, but I don't like trim the long stuff so it gets to be a few inches.  Now that you know too much about me, let me delve even deeper (into the bush).

So, in his article (you really should just read it, and this would be easier for both of us), Limon discusses how the one light hair turned into several overnight.  Guess what happened to me?  The next day I had three.  I was horrified.  It's one thing to read some article about it written by some guy I don't know.  It's another to experience this first hand.  The thing is, I don't have grey hairs on my head.  That day I noticed the pubes, I made the FP look through my hair (the hair on my head, that is) for greys.  None.  Weird.  Seemingly unfair.  I just feel like if I had grey hair on my head first, it would have softened the blow for the ones in my bush.  I guess this is normal timing though according to Limon's research.

Anyway, I got over that and don't really think about it that much.  Currently, I still only see like two to four down there.  I don't feel like digging around down there and separating them out to count.  I am typing on the computer, so that would mean I would have to stop and go wash my hands after I finish counting.  That makes me wonder though, do any of you masturbate while on the computer?  I'm just wondering, like if you're having internet sex or something, and you have to type and get yourself off at the same time, isn't that gross?  Just think of all the dirty germs on that keyboard.  Or maybe you have a computer condom that you use and then you take off after you've done the deed?

So, lately though, I've noticed something else going on with my pubes.  So, this will happen at home, but it seems to happen more when I'm in a public bathroom.  When I use the facilities, when I wipe, a pube will fall out and land on the toilet seat.  So, it happens more in the public facility because I don't sit on those toilets.  I kind of hover above it.  It's good exercise like doing squats.  It seems like every time in a public toilet there's a pubic hair on the toilet seat.  So, unless the bathroom is totally disgusting and there was piss on the seat before, I wipe my piss and my pube off the seat.

It just seems like I'm losing more pubes than usual.  Let's say one every other time I go.  And I do have to pee an average of 8 times a day.  Yeah, I know, that probably sounds like a lot.  I did mention this to the doctor, so don't worry, it's being looked into.  Anyway, my bush does seem a little thinner.  When I was younger, before I started landscaping, it was a big shrub.  I remember, I would have to try to smooth it down so it didn't protrude from my bathing suit.  Well, when that started being an issue, I realized that I was going to have to learn to garden.

Anyway, getting back to the present day, I mean, I guess I don't notice shedding them unless it's one that's left behind on the toilet or in the tub.  Anyway, I googled, "do you lose your pubic hair as you get older?"  So, I found the answers.com question, "do older women lose their pubic hair?"  The answer was that as women (and men) age the hair on their bodies gets thinner.  But then, it was mentioned that depending on age, this could be an indication of malnutrition or thyroid disorder. Ding ding ding... maybe I do have hyperthyroidism?  I guess we'll find out on Nov. 7.  I have been pulling small clumps of hair out of my head when I wash it, but that doesn't necessarily seem like anything out of the ordinary since I figured I'm just in the shedding stage instead of the growing stage.  I wish I would just shed more under my arms and on my legs instead of my head.  I guess as long as I don't go bald below like a Pamela Anderson thing, I don't care that much if it thins out some.

Man, even though this is more of a health & beauty issue, this blog is probably going to be banned from google adsense for life!

Tired

Do I have to write this?  I feel too tired to be funny tonight. or to even blather coherently about anything.  I think I had 3 or 4 hours of sleep last night, and I cannot function on less than 6 hours of sleep anymore.  I lose IQ points.  Permanently.  Like I almost typed "I loose IQ points."  I guess because they are always too tight?

Anyway, this lady comedianne (this word bugs me) was on Craig Kilborne tonight.

I'm going to continue kind of in the vein (that is a gross saying) of the blog from yesterday.  Females and humor.  So, I think that some women are overlooked in that department.  It's like if a woman tries to make a joke and it flops, then a male may pat her on the head and say, "that's cute, you tried to make a joke."  The female may be me and the male may be the FP.

Getting back to the Kilborne Show lass.  She was not funny.  After the talk about women and their funnyness credability, I so wanted her to be funny.  So she was dressed like a real mom with some peach or pink blouse and a gold chain necklace thing.  I feel like her look was so not funny that it distracted me from her jokes, which weren't really funny.  Maybe if she had been really crass and profane, the look would have worked because it would have contradicted the jokes.  But it was just like typical men think they're awesome and we know they're not jokes.

So, my sister told me I should do stand up, which is very flattering.  But I don't know if my jokes in conversation would play out in a one way conversation, or an act.  I'm really not good at telling stories, so I couldn't be a story teller type of comedianNE.  I'm good at making fun of people and saying shocking things when least expected.  So, maybe I could just play it out by seeming to have a crappy routine with a not so funny story, and then hit them with some shocking racial joke with lewd language.  And I could dress in my bright mismatched clothes with striped knee length socks and stuff.

But I don't know if I could do open mic nights.  Those sound like a lot of pressure.  Maybe a youtube video of me doing stand up.  Or even better yet, I could do a series of bad stand up routines.  So bad that it's funny?
 
Okay, I obviously, so obviously need to go to bed!

Men Are Funnier Than Women, Funnier Looking

So, I don't want to start getting all academic on you, but I think I was supposed to be some kind of teacher or professor, or a zoologist.  Anyhoo, I was driving to the tire store this morning to get two back tires.  So, I was listening to the 94.9 Mikey show, and they were talking about an article about a study done at UCSD.  The object was to find out if men were funnier than women.  Obviously, that is an objective subject, right?

  UCSD study  Here's the link.

Anyway, the test subjects were undergrads.  16 males and 16 females were told to write captions for New Yorker cartoons, and then other students rated which anonymous captions were funnier.  So men (are college boys really men though?) were found to be .11 more points funnier than women (whores, sorry, girls).  What does that even mean?

The radio personalities started exploring further the general assumption that men are thought to be funnier than women.  So, I think Mikey was saying how humor is like a muscle that needs to be exercised and men exercise their muscles more than women.  Well, men tend to exercise their genital muscles more, so it would be consistent that they exercise their comedic muscles more as well?   It sucked because I was driving in the car.  Being a resident of California means that talking on the phone and driving is illegal unless it's hands free.  So, I couldn't call 94.9 and weigh in my heavy opinion on the subject.

I personally think one component that makes someone funny more than their gender is the presence of pain or trauma in one's life.  I think I've blogged about this before: how many perfectly happy people with a wonderful childhood are hilarious?

So, men are generalized as not being as sensitive as women and sublimating their feelings rather than talking about it.  Women are generalized as being all open and always wanting to talk about feelings.  So, less open men who stuff their true feeling down probably let it spurt out in funny ways.  So people who have had a traumatic childhood and haven't reconciled themselves with their past may relieve the pressure by being hilarious.  The darker the underlying turmoil, the funnier the person.  Need I site any comedians who died of drug overdoses? Well, it doesn't matter.  This isn't a scientific journal, and I don't feel like citing my references.  Plus it's really late at night.

So let's bring this topic back to me.  After all, that's mostly what I blog about - myself.  I'm so full of myself.  Yet at the same time I despise myself.

I think I have blogged about the fact that I was born a female, but I was supposed to be born a male.  So, like, I don't like girls, but some of my traits are more boylike.  In my younger years I was in fact often mistaken for a boy, which was always upsetting.  I also was very hairy when I was puberty age.  My arms and knuckles were very hairy.  One time in junior high, in class, a boy pointed out how I had hairy knuckles.  That was embarrassing.  Now, my knuckles and arms are not as hairy, which is relieving.

Anyhoo,  I had a very horrible nightmarish childhood, and I've been dealing with (or not dealing with) family issues all my life.  These issues are so weighing on my personality that I had to start blogging about that shit too in my third blog.

So, here's my equation:

(male-like) tendency to hold emotions in  +  painful childhood  =  hilarious Food Ho

Okay, maybe "hilarious" is an overstatement.  But, I think I'm fairly witty and amusing at the very least.  I'm not necessarily known as being as funny as I really am because of one factor.  The Food Pimp.  My louder, larger personality, more charismatic other half.  He also tends to hold emotions in (until they come gushing out usually after the application of alcohol) and he is male.  So, I don't stand a chance when I'm next to him.  Often, when we're in a group and I crack a joke, no one hears it but the FP.  So, he will repeat it, and he will get gales of laughter.  Usually though, he will credit me with the joke, but that still diminishes my credentials for humor, because my delivery with my screechy voice was off.

Also, my humor is much more on the darker side, with lots of curse words, which I've noticed makes some people uncomfortable and totally offends others.  The FP's humor has totally evolved to have more of a mainstream appeal, due to all the cooking classes that he has "taught" over the years.

So, you want me to end with some joke or some funny statement, right?  Man, I feel a lot of pressure.  I will say I'm a lot funnier the more intoxicated you are.  So, go get some beer, liquor, wine, malt liquor, moonshine, medical marijuana or whatever.  I'll wait...........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Okay, here's all I've got.  It's really late at night, as I mentioned before.  The only reason I'm up this late is because we have a minor crisis on our hands.  But I'm not going to talk about that right now.  I'm just going to stuff it down for now like some dirty wet cotton candy.

The FP's band had their cd release party tonight.  So the bass player and the drummer both had the diarrhea or loose stool or had to go poop a lot or something.  So, someone asked what happened that they both got it.  So the bass player said the last time he saw the drummer he drank from his water and next thing he knew he had the shits.  So everyone laughed a little.  So I waited until the laughter stopped and I said, I thought it was from all the anal sex.  Big laughs.  The guitar player pointed out how I had impeccable timing.

Score .2 points for the ladies!!!

Anyway, it fucking later than a booty call, and I got to get up relatively early tomorrow.....

Bear of a day

Bears everywhere.  I'm sure you've seen this one by now.  I just don't understand how this little guy got all the way in the store into the produce cooler before anyone noticed or stopped him.  Although, I guess if I saw a cute little bear gallop into my local grocery store, I would just follow it with a video camera and then post it on youtube.  Of course this is adorable, but one can't help but wonder where his mama bear is.  And then at the end of the video, they just take him out.  From what was reported, he was just left outside somewhere?  It's a baby bear!  You can't just kick it out to fend for itself!!!!


And then the guy in Ohio.  On to more serious disturbing news.  The guy with the exotic animal menagerie.  He had about 50 animals.  So, he only had licenses for like 4 bears.  He let all the animals out of their cages and then killed himself.  So, where was his wife?  Why didn't he just kill himself and leave someone to find the animals and rescue them?  Didn't he love them?  I guess he wanted to commit a murder suicide but couldn't kill the animals, so he left the local cops to kill them.  The pictures of all the dead animals laid out is so sad.  The guy had 18 bengal tigers.  All dead.  They could have been taken somewhere and taken proper care of.  What kind of person would do this?  And these cops.  I'm sure some of them will carry with them tremendous guilt for having to kill these beautiful creatures.


And then my poor Stinksy.  We put the pet carriers out so that the cats would get used to them.  The Fuzz doesn't like her carrier of course.  She has been known to go into Stinksy's for a bit, though, as seen here.

Stinksy, on the other hand, has been spending half the day in the thing.

I put a paw stocking with cat nip in there for him, but he wasn't really interested in it.  Anyway, even though he looks really cute in it, I'm a little worried.  Now that I know he has cardiomyopathy, everything he does out of the ordinary is going to worry me.  I mean, I put a soft Padres blanket down in there, and it's been cooler, so why wouldn't he want to hang out in there?  It's like his own little cave.  Cats are always trying to find enclosed spaces to nap in, so should I worry, right?

But it's like we feel like we don't want him to get too excited, like he's going to fall down dead.  I guess the vet didn't help any.  I went in to get his expensive pet food, so I talked to the regular vet when I was there.  She has a very stoical demeanor.  So it's kind of scary when someone like that is telling you that it could be degenerative and shorten his life............................ or some cats are known to live a full life with no complications.  Anyway, I am a real pessimist, but in this one case, I really want to try to take the optimistic route.

I mean, this fucking cat huddled in a hotel room behind our other cat while Katrina rattled around outside and shook the windows.  Talk about having a heart attack.  What the hell did these cats think was going on?  We brought them to a strange hotel room, and then in the middle of the night strangers banged on the door and took us away.  Shortly after, the hotel gets throttled with a crazy storm.  And then we took the cats back home and left them there alone.  Well, we gave the key to strangers who filled huge bowls of food and water for them.  But they were not happy with us.

Then later on, I picked up a puppy on the side of a busy street.  We fostered him for about a week.  Needless to say, the cats didn't take too kindly to having him in their house.

Right around then, Stinksy got neutered by a butcher, who carved his stomach looking for his other testicle, which she didn't find.  Then she, or whoever stitched him up did a poor job, and he chewed them out.  So, a series of vet visits followed, accompanied by the dreaded cone, and daily antibiotics.

And then, the FP took the cats on a cross country trip in an overstuffed 2 door Toyota Echo.  While having to give him antibiotics and keep his cone on.

Poor guy.  That earlier experience makes me think his heart is stronger than it looks on an echocardiogram.  At least that's what I hope.  I also want to get my money's worth out of this little guy.  He's one pricey American Shorthair.

LMFAO ROTMFFL!!!!!!!!!!!

So, you know how when you set up a new blog, and you add different design elements to the page.  Like an archive, links, search toolbar, etc?  Well, if you don't know, that's what happens when you set up a new blog.  One of the design elements is a google adsense html.  So, if you put this on your page and sign up, then you earn like $.01 per 1000 impressions or some kind of third world slave labor wage.

Well, you know, when I was setting up this blog, I added the adsense.  Why not?

Why not?  I'll tell you why.  Because I am the Food Ho, after all.  What are the chances that a blogger with an alias like The Food Ho would have adult content on her page.  Pretty high, I imagine.

This is the email I just received:
(Make sure to refer to the violating link)




       Google AdSense:  You have 3 working days to make changes to your site

This message was sent from a notification-only email address that does not
accept incoming email. Please do not reply to this message.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hello,

During a recent review of your account we found that you are currently
displaying Google ads in a manner that is not compliant with our program
policies
(https://www.google.com/support/adsense/bin/answer.py?answer=48182&stc=aspe-1pp-en).

--------------------------------------------------
EXAMPLE PAGE:
http://unnecessarysupplement.blogspot.com/2011/10/gas-chamber.html

Please note that this URL is an example and that the same violations may
exist on other pages of this website or other sites in your network.

VIOLATION(S) FOUND:

ADULT/EXPLICIT TEXT: As stated in our program policies, AdSense publishers
are not permitted to place Google ads on pages with adult or mature
content, including sexually explicit text. More information about this
policy can be found in our help center (
https://www.google.com/adsense/support/as/bin/answer.py?hl=en&answer=105957
).

REQUESTED ACTION: Please make all necessary changes in the next 72 hours.

If the violations are corrected within the aforementioned time period, ad
serving will not be affected. If changes are not made and/or other policy
violations are encountered during the review process, ad serving will be
disabled to your site.

ACCOUNT STATUS: ACTIVE

Your AdSense account remains active. However, if we continue to find
problems, we may disable your entire account. Therefore, we suggest that
you take the time to review the rest of your network to ensure that all of
your other pages are in compliance with our policies.



--------------------------------------------------
Thank you for your cooperation.

Sincerely,

The Google AdSense Team
----------------
For more information regarding this email, please visit our Help Center:
https://www.google.com/adsense/support/bin/answer.py?answer=113058&stc=aspe-ai4-en.

So then, if you look up the link under adult/explicit text, it says:

Adult content

The AdSense network is considered family-safe, which means that publishers aren't permitted to place         Google ads on sites which contain adult content. In addition to photos and videos which contain nudity or sexual activities, here are some other examples of unacceptable content:

• Lewd or provocative images
• Crude or indecent language, including adult stories
• Sexual tips or advice
• Sexual fetish sites (e.g. foot fetish content)
• Adult toys or products
• Ads or links to external sites containing adult content

If your site has content which you wouldn't be comfortable viewing at work or with family members around, then it probably isn't an appropriate site to place Google ads upon.

LOFL!!!  Slap me with a wrinkled ball sack!!!!!! Fuck me gently underwater with a sea cucumber being attacked by an electric eel!!!!

Maybe I would be perfectly comfortable viewing my site at work or with family members around.  I guess I have poor judgment of these matters.

Obviously, I went to edit the design and deleted the Google AdSense HTML.  The Food Ho sells out to no one.  Okay, I would, but I might need to be paid more than a dollar a decade.

Oh, and thanks a lot Canine Cologne.  You led the innocent downy white lamb to the violent bloody slaughter.  When the Google AdSense police come knocking on my door, I am going to totally direct them to you as my accessory!!!!  It's like giving sex toys to your teenager!!!

I leave you with some parting sexually explicit adult content profanity:

wiener jammer
meat slime
sperm sandwich
pork muncher
beef stain
pecker fondler
snot lover
slut wad
fanny dangler
shit twister

New Post

So, to update from yesterday, I went to the clinic and saw the doctor.  I opted not to fast, because I could really use the coffee, and also needed to drink some Boathouse Farms Green Goodness juice to tie me over until we had lunch.  Anyway, I wouldn't have wanted to leave the exam and have to wait around in the lab to get blood drawn, so I'll just go tomorrow when they open.  So, that's that.  Getting tested for diabetes and hyperthyroid.  So, Stinksy didn't have hyperthyroid, but maybe I do!

So, moving on, once again, I had a topic in mind and I forgot it!

Well, I could talk about the radio spot that the FP's band had last night.  So, I can't reveal the name of the band, because then you might find out who he is and in turn find out who I am.  If you don't know who I am and you really want to find out, I'm not going to just tell you.  So, anyway, they were on the local radio station to promote their forthcoming album release and show for said album release.

So, this should be an exciting joyous occasion, but it was kind of not, leading up to it.  The band leader was kind of late in letting the band know what time to go there, so they were just in a holding pattern for several hours wondering if he was going to pull the plug or what.  They got the word first on facebook that it was a go, and then half an hour later he texted the FP to let him know.

Anyway, it worked out, they got there in time, and the DJ played 4 of their songs, and then they plugged the show and album.  So it was successful.  I really don't know if anyone we knew was listening, but either way, it was a great opportunity for them.  

I just realized that I will have only played 2 shows in 2011 by the time 2012 rolls around.  2 shows.  The first one was in January, and our female singer didn't make it.  The second one was our CD release show, which while people in the audience said it was good, we knew better.  It was kind of like a train wreck.  We didn't rehearse enough, and instead of it being a joyous exciting night, it was just kind of  night of hoping to get through each song without any major mistakes.  That's so sad.

I know I don't sit around all day with a guitar in my hand, but I do enjoy playing music.  I love playing live shows.  That's the best part of being in a band for me.  It's the most fun.  It boggles my mind when people say how they hate playing live shows because they have such high anxiety that it's not fun.  As long as there is no band drama, it's just fun to me.  The anxiousness or nervous energy I play before playing a show is good energy, it's like getting a energy drink filled with dopamine.

The more electronic influenced project that we started working on was really starting to take shape, but then I had to go and decide to move us across the country.  So, we'll see what direction our music takes when we land ourselves on the east coast.  It should be interesting, and it will most certainly be a wild ride, but I will definitely do my best to enjoy it.  

Office Visits

So, we took Stinksy to his cardiologist appointment on Friday.  I've never been to a cardiologist, but my cat has.  So, it was confirmed that he has cardiomyopathy on the low end of the scale.  Just a bit above what is termed as normal.  So what this means is that one wall of his heart is slightly thickened.  The cardiologist did also see some fibrous formations, but he didn't know what that meant.  Anyway, this means that he needs to be monitored.  So, more expensive visits to the vet in his future.  And if it is determined that it's thickening, then he may have to take medication daily or twice a day!  Yikes!  I can't imagine having to give the poor guy something twice a day.  Sure, we would get used to it, but he is really good at holding a pill in his mouth forever and then spitting it back up when you assume he had to have swallowed it by then.  So, hopefully that will not happen.

Tomorrow I have a doctor visit of my own.  I decided to see if I can get tested for diabetes.  I've taken those online tests, and they end up with the suggestion that I should get checked by a physician right away!  So, here I am after feeling these symptoms for who knows how long, going to get it checked out.  Although I don't know if they are going to take a blood test tomorrow.  So, I will have to call when I wake up tomorrow and ask.  Because if I have to fast and not have any coffee beforehand, I guess I should know this.  I'm sure it will be nothing though - another case of my hypochondria.  I'm always saying something is wrong with me, and the FP is saying yeah, you have hypochondria.

So, is it sick that if the test comes back with something wrong with me I will feel ..... validated?  Yes, it is isn't.  I always make the joke how one day I will be diagnosed with cancer and I'll rub it in his face.  Ha ha.

But really, I don't want cancer or diabetes.  But what if I'm told nothing is wrong with me?  What if I am told that it is normal to be thirsty all day long and drink at least a gallon of water a day, be hungry all the time, get the shakes and feel faint if I haven't eaten 4 hours after my last meal, get dizzy randomly when I might just be sitting at the computer, get tingly arms when I jog, and almost gag every time I brush my teeth?  WHAT IF IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD? What if this blog is also all in my head and none of the events that I write about never happened?  What if I'm a crazy person in an insane asylum that thinks I'm writing a blog, but the reality is that I'm just carving gibberish on my arm, or even worse, writing gibberish on the walls with my blood and feces?

Speaking of feces, my cat shat on the bed the other night.  While I was laying on the bed.  Okay, she didn't shit on the bed, but she like had a soft lump of shit on the back of her long ass fur, and when she got on the bed she either licked it off or it just rubbed off onto the bed.  So, I moved on the bed, and then I felt something soft on my leg.  So I reached down to feel around, and then I brought my hand up to my face to look at it, and there was a piece of poop staring back at me from my finger.  It was like the size of a quarter.  Poop on my finger.  Cat poop.  There was now just a little brown smear on my leg, because it was all on my finger.  So I wiped the poop off my finger and I scrubbed my finger.  I scrubbed my leg.  Then I scrubbed my finger.  Leg, then long scrub of my whole hand, like an OCD scrub.  I was glad I had that bar of soap from a hotel that had sea salt in it.  The salt really helped buff the poop off.

So then I had to take the sheet and blanket off the bed.  And then I had to wipe The Fuzz's butt off as much as she would let me, because while there was no visible poop on it, her butt stank of shit.  So, then I tried to climb into bed again and relax and read my book.  I was hoping she wouldn't come up on the bed again.  Luckily, I think the butt cleaning pissed her off, so she didn't get back on the bed until I was asleep.  Which was fine.

OCD Much?

So, the FP went to the bar without me for the first time in months.  It's a beautiful day, so he decided to go to the Ruby Room with his bandmate.  If you don't know the Ruby Room, it's a very dark dive bar that often has art shows and bands and goth nights.

So, you ask why didn't I go?  Well, here's why:

1.  I didn't feel like drinking.
2.  I didn't feel like hanging out in a dark dingy bar in the middle of the afternoon.
3.  I figure the FP could use some guy time at the bar, since I'm always around.
4.  I had this noxious strong and very diffusive gas, that no human should be subjected to.
5.  I wanted to look for a cat carrier.

So, as you know, unless you never read this blog, we are moving across the country.  Also, as you know, if you are an avid UnnecessarySupplement reader, we have two cats; Stinksy and The Fuzz.  So, we had to buy a second carrier on the fly the other day before going to the vet.  Have you ever tried to put two full grown cats in the same pet taxi?  It's difficult.  Once you get one in, and you're trying to push the other in, the first one is trying to make a break for it.  So, we got a carrier that was just too small.  And we used it, so we are stuck with this small carrier.  I suppose if we ever get that pomeranian that the FP wants, it will be perfect for it.

Anyway, we began a quest to find another carrier for The Fuzz.  Stinksy is actually pretty comfortable with his.  I have been putting cat treats in the carriers.  So, Stinksy will reach in the small one and take them out, as he can't even fit in that one.  But with his pet taxi, he will hang out in there after eating all the cat treats!

So, I googled pet stores today.  It seems like there are not any stores specializing in cat products.  I mean there might be, but I didn't find any.  It seems that all the independent pet stores are focused on fish or dogs.  So there's stores like Wag N Tails and Bow Wow Boutique.  I'm sure they also have cat stuff too, but I don't want to support a place that discriminates against cats.  Even though I feel like all pet stores do.  There's always way more aisles for dogs.  Not that I don't love dogs and want to get one soon.  But, what about the fancy cats?!  And I know, a pet carrier is a unibreed kind of contraption.  But it's the principle!  I'm going to start a protest movement.... Occupy Canine Diego.  Yeah.  I'm going to round up a bunch of cats and have them all gather in front of all the dogcentric pet stores.

Anyhoo, so, I got home and I started googling pet carriers.  And here, 4 hours later, I finished picking one out and I am blogging about it.  Is that too much time spent on research for something that will probably ultimately disappoint?  I'm kind of... OCD.  Like I have a few "specifications" as my dad would say, that were required for The Fuzz's pet limo.

1.  Couldn't be hideous and utilitarian looking.
2.  Had to be kind of girly, as she is a fluffy dainty short plump kitty.
3.  Had to have plenty of mesh windows so she could see what the fuck was going on.
4.  Had to have at least 2 ways of trying to cram her into the thing.
5.  Had to have soft sides so it wouldn't take up so much room in the car.
6.  Had to be longer, wider and taller than that little carrier that we bought.
7.  Could not be overly pricey.
8.  Should be as cute as possible. (We were hoping for Hello Kitty, but those are like $140 +)
9.  The Fuzz should be able to get used to it and be comfortable in the thing.

So, I looked.  And looked.  And looked.  There are a shitload of pet carriers out there in world wide webland.  There are a lot that have cute designs, but barely any mesh windows.  And most of the cute ones are small, because, really they are aimed at girls and ladies with teeny dogs.

So, there was a cool tote bag one that was pretty cheap, and each of the four panels was all mesh.  But when I looked up the dimensons, it was like tote bag dimension.  Which is fine for carrying your teeny teacup chihuahua around the Bebe store, but not so fine for your fussy cat to be hanging out in.  Although, since I already wasted money on one pet carrier I didn't need, I should have just bought it.  It could have been a step towards becoming a pet carrier hoarder.

So, then I saw this pink duffle bag type carrier that had lots of mesh all the way around.  It was light pink with a zebra stripe liner pillow inside.  So it wasn't the cutest, but I liked the mesh ratio.  Even though I figured, the more mesh, the more flimsy, right?  So, that one was a bookmarker, although I didn't bookmark it.

Then I found this basket.  It came in red, green or black, floral pattern.  It had an aluminum frame, and 3/4 of the fabric panels around it were mesh!  This was so Fuzz!  But there was no description about the size of the thing.  It said small.  So I searched and searched, and after a long as time, I found out that it was too small, but there was a large size as well.  But it had to be shipped from Australia and delivery time was like 10 - 20 business days.  So, it would be a nail biter as to whether or not we would get it in time.  So, after almost 4 hours, I decided on the pink and zebra print one.  Hopefully it will hold up long enough to make it through our trip to Florida!  When this thing arrives, The Fuzz won't even appreciate that it took me hours to research and pick out this damn carrier!

You Gotta Play The Part

So, on a rare occasion we are going out on a Friday night.  With friends.  No band gig.  So, even though I took a shower last night and didn't exert much effort today thus didn't perspire, I took a shower again tonight.  So, these friends of ours have been married just a year.  And they just moved into a new house.    We are going to meet them for "beer and cheap eats"  so I'm going to assume that they are not pregnant. Yet.  They plan things.  So, I'm sure they will shortly start trying to get pregnant.

Anyhoo, their names on the food blog were Mr. Interested In You (Mr. IIY) and Valley Girl (her condo was in Mission Valley).  So, they are great.  Mr. IIY is like the most genial guy.  He's like just a really nice guy who remembers conversations with people and he's a good conversation starter.  He looks like a younger Kurt Warner, the retired Arizona Cardinals quarterback.  One of our friends had a crush on him so much, that her boyfriend's mom warned the boyfriend to watch out for girlfriend and Mr. IIY.  It's fine now though.  That other couple are engaged and successful and doing very well together.

Valley Girl is like a great person too.  She looks kind of innocent.  Just like her face looks so sweet, and maybe the way she dresses.  But, she's fun and she does like to party.  And she looks like my dear friend from Nola, who used to be a party girl back in the day.  So, they are a great couple and it's always great to hang out with them on rare occasions.

So, this couple makes people question their appearance when going out with them.  Okay, it makes the FP and me question our appearance.  Like, if the two of us were just going for drinks, I would put the first going out compatible bottoms on, and any comfortable shirt.  I probably wouldn't do anything to my hair if it didn't look too fucked up.  But what did I do tonight?  I brushed my hair.  This is generally no easy task, as it's usually all knotted and dreaded up.  But luckily, I had washed and combed my hair yesterday, and put tons of frizz ease in it.  So It just needed about 5 more pumps of frizz ease and a fast brush through.  But then I looked at myself in the mirror, and I noticed my part.

So, I part my hair on the left.  I think I always have.  I know there have been times way back when, when a stylist has tried to part it on the right, and then quickly flipped it back.  So anyway, my part was about half an inch too far in the center.  It was more like an exercise, work or housecleaning part.  Yes, there is a difference.  If it's parted more to the side, then it is more likely to fall in my face, which is fine for socializing, bad for working.

And really, you say, does a part that much more to the side make that much of a difference?  Well, yeah.  One time, I don't recall if it was one of the FP's other band's show or one of our band's show, but, I had carefully washed my hair, combed and brushed it, and put the part in the appropriate location.  I mean, sometimes you have to redo your part, or move a couple hairs to this side, a couple to that side.  Sometimes if I'm feeling ambitious I'll do the crisscross part.  Anyway,  I didn't style it.  I just washed, combed and parted it.  I might have put the frizz ease in if we had some.  But, like, everyone commented on how nice my hair looked.  Like, it was like, what did you do different?  My answer was, I washed it.

So, I'm feeling pretty sassy, like I should be on a Garnier Fructis commercial.  I mean, I've used that shit long enough to be a damn spokesperson.