I've always been regarded for my grace, my poise, my equanimity.
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Let's start with my hair. It's basically it's own entity. It's so soft and flowing and silky to the touch. Ok, it's the exact opposite. It's dry, and itchy, and always tangled, and it gets in my way a lot. It is a nuisance, but I can't be bothered to get it cut, either.
This might be the first and only photo of myself that I post here. I used to want to remain anonymous. Before the days of Yelp, and even before #foodporn, before smart phones, I used to take pictures of food with my little canon digital camera. Or whatever brand it was. Then I would go home and download the photos onto our home computer and write a blog. I knew not many people read it, and I felt pretty anonymous, even though I didn't take any measures to be anonymous. I think I had links to our band myspace & facebook pages. But, I didn't worry about that too much. Until one day when I saw that a restaurant had done a web search (I don't know if it was google back then yet) and came across my blog. I was just trying to be entertaining, but they took my blog to heart, like a restaurant review. As if I had influence. So, one night we went there. And they knew it was me - The Food Ho. The owner served us, and then she stood there, behind the bar, in front of us, with a smile pasted to her face, watching us eat.
So, I did what any other anonymous blogger who is suddenly exposed by her subject would do. I didn't write about the restaurant visit for a long long time. They checked my blog a lot for the first few days, and then less, and less. And then when I did write about them, I didn't name the restaurant or the exact location. I am almost 100% sure that my writing about this restaurant did not influence anyone one way or another to go to the restaurant or not. Most of my audience was my friends and family who did not live anywhere near San Diego. And then a handful of my audience was other fellow food bloggers who didn't live in the immediate area, and they really focused more on Asian food.
So getting back to the story at hand...
This is the Dremel tool that I use to file Rudy's nails. Rudy is our big 90 pound fluffy black terror, who whimpers like a puppy when he gets his nails clipped. So, I did hours of internet research before I finally purchased this drill with little sanding attachments. You can probably buy it for a little cheaper if you just get the regular drill that doesn't have the paw sticker on it....
Anyway, this drill is a life saver. Rudy will withstand this thing on his nails for a second or so. But, the other day I found out this little baby has another use that isn't in the manual.
It can give you instant dreads in 2 seconds! So, in my case, it can make me look more like my sister. (On a side note, the slide slippers in the photo are over 13 years old. I have very much become my parents by wearing clothes that started out unfashionable when I got them, and continuing to wear them until they fall apart. One of the soles came apart, but I just gorilla glued that shit back down)
Back to the insta dread. I had my hair wrapped in the Dremel tool. It took a while to get it dislodged. And then I thought I was just going to have to cut that strand out. But finally with patience, I was able to unravel it.
The sad part about this little bungling comical episode, was that no one was there to witness it. Besides Rudy. He was just relieved that I was distracted with my hair that I couldn't keep filing his nails....
