Pubes

So, maybe about six weeks ago, I was reading a City Beat opinion article about getting grey pubes.  Gray Matters by Enrique Limon.  Hilarious fucking article.  Lo and behold, a week or two later, I notice this long ass grey pube.  On my body.  In my bush.  It was long.  I do clean up and shave so I'm not sporting untamed 70s bush, but I don't like trim the long stuff so it gets to be a few inches.  Now that you know too much about me, let me delve even deeper (into the bush).

So, in his article (you really should just read it, and this would be easier for both of us), Limon discusses how the one light hair turned into several overnight.  Guess what happened to me?  The next day I had three.  I was horrified.  It's one thing to read some article about it written by some guy I don't know.  It's another to experience this first hand.  The thing is, I don't have grey hairs on my head.  That day I noticed the pubes, I made the FP look through my hair (the hair on my head, that is) for greys.  None.  Weird.  Seemingly unfair.  I just feel like if I had grey hair on my head first, it would have softened the blow for the ones in my bush.  I guess this is normal timing though according to Limon's research.

Anyway, I got over that and don't really think about it that much.  Currently, I still only see like two to four down there.  I don't feel like digging around down there and separating them out to count.  I am typing on the computer, so that would mean I would have to stop and go wash my hands after I finish counting.  That makes me wonder though, do any of you masturbate while on the computer?  I'm just wondering, like if you're having internet sex or something, and you have to type and get yourself off at the same time, isn't that gross?  Just think of all the dirty germs on that keyboard.  Or maybe you have a computer condom that you use and then you take off after you've done the deed?

So, lately though, I've noticed something else going on with my pubes.  So, this will happen at home, but it seems to happen more when I'm in a public bathroom.  When I use the facilities, when I wipe, a pube will fall out and land on the toilet seat.  So, it happens more in the public facility because I don't sit on those toilets.  I kind of hover above it.  It's good exercise like doing squats.  It seems like every time in a public toilet there's a pubic hair on the toilet seat.  So, unless the bathroom is totally disgusting and there was piss on the seat before, I wipe my piss and my pube off the seat.

It just seems like I'm losing more pubes than usual.  Let's say one every other time I go.  And I do have to pee an average of 8 times a day.  Yeah, I know, that probably sounds like a lot.  I did mention this to the doctor, so don't worry, it's being looked into.  Anyway, my bush does seem a little thinner.  When I was younger, before I started landscaping, it was a big shrub.  I remember, I would have to try to smooth it down so it didn't protrude from my bathing suit.  Well, when that started being an issue, I realized that I was going to have to learn to garden.

Anyway, getting back to the present day, I mean, I guess I don't notice shedding them unless it's one that's left behind on the toilet or in the tub.  Anyway, I googled, "do you lose your pubic hair as you get older?"  So, I found the answers.com question, "do older women lose their pubic hair?"  The answer was that as women (and men) age the hair on their bodies gets thinner.  But then, it was mentioned that depending on age, this could be an indication of malnutrition or thyroid disorder. Ding ding ding... maybe I do have hyperthyroidism?  I guess we'll find out on Nov. 7.  I have been pulling small clumps of hair out of my head when I wash it, but that doesn't necessarily seem like anything out of the ordinary since I figured I'm just in the shedding stage instead of the growing stage.  I wish I would just shed more under my arms and on my legs instead of my head.  I guess as long as I don't go bald below like a Pamela Anderson thing, I don't care that much if it thins out some.

Man, even though this is more of a health & beauty issue, this blog is probably going to be banned from google adsense for life!