What Are You Afraid Of?

I'll admit it.  I don't know anymore what topics I have blogged about and what ones I haven't.  And I know there are topics that I have written about multiple times.  So, anyway, I'm going to write about my fears.  Even though I feel like I've written that list before, but I'm too lazy to review every blog and make sure.  I guess that's what separates me from a professional blogger.  That, and my use of slang, profanity and bad grammar.

Anyhoo, I was sitting in the bathroom, taking a piss.  I realized that I had already used the last of the toilet paper but had not replaced the roll.  So, I was sitting on the toilet with no toilet paper.  Our storage in the house is very limited.  We had loads more storage space in our tiny apartment before.  So, anyway, I had bought a large package of Cottonelle.  I knew it was a big pack, but it was on sale for a good price point, so I bought it.  I stuffed as many rolls as I could fit in the cabinet of the main bathroom.  Then I stuffed about five rolls in the other bathroom.  The rest, I stuffed in the kitchen where the paper towels were.  Later on, I moved the backup toilet paper to the bedroom closet.

Of course, we ran out of toilet paper in the main bathroom first.  I kept forgetting to tell the FP about the backup toilet paper in the bedroom.  So, every time the FP would run out of toilet paper he would get another roll from the other bathroom.  I kept forgetting to tell him where the other stock of shite paper was.  And I kept forgetting to stock the bathroom too.

So, there I was, just a little while ago, sitting on the toilet with no wiping paper.  Thankfully, I hadn't dropped a deuce.  Not that this hasn't happened before.  So what do you do?  What did I do?  I loosely put my underwear and shorts back on and ran the 8 footsteps to the bedroom closet to grab a roll.

But, what do we do when we are in a public bathroom and we realize there's no TP for our bunghole?  I shake, you know.  I don't recall ever having the issue after taking a shit in public.  Usually if I have to number two in a public restroom, I check for TP before I pull my pants down.  It's a reflex.

Which brings me to the topic of the day.  What are you afraid of?  Here's some of my fears:

1. Shitting myself in public.

2. spiders - deadly or scary looking ones

3. snakes

4. roaches

5. rats

6. all other pests

7. rapists

8. murderers

9. being suddenly homeless

10. people breaking into the house at night

11. embarrassing myself

12. never working again

13.  drunk driving

14.  getting arrested

15.  ghosts

16. possession

17.  haunted houses

18.  people I love dying horrible deaths

19.  sudden catastrophic events

20.  witnessing something horrible happening and not having the ability to stop it or tell anyone who can stop it


Well, that's about it.  I'm going to try to drink a little more wine so I can fall asleep early.  I have to wake up very very early tomorrow!