facebook Quotes

Here is the ultimate laziness in blog posting. It's too hot for me to think straight!!! So, I'm just going to quote facebook status updates and whatnot, anonymously of course, since I'm not going to like ask for permission or anything.


It feels like Christmas Eve

But I don't want to keep up with the Kardashians, except to bitch slap all of them at least once.

One melted Sisters of Mercy Floodland tape. 1987-2011. *raises fist at heat*

Piper the cocker spaniel is a morning person... or dog!

Is there ever a good answer to "I wonder what the dog is playing with that is making that unusual noise?"

You've got to be a special kind of stupid to slam your stethoscope in your car door and drag it to and from work at least twice without noticing. Thanks to the good Samaritan who flagged me down on the interstate. I'm sorry I thought you were a car jacker.

Apparently San Diego's weather is confused with Vegas in the summer weather today....Me no likey

Wife finds her husband up alone at night. As she watches him wipe a tear from his eye "What's the matter?" He says"Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" The wife touched at his caring says "Yes, I do. "You remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car and shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years" "I remember" she replies softly,He cries "I would have gotten out today!"

Easy-E would have been 48 today.

Genetic improvement is constrained by the biological production cycle of the bovine so extreme makeovers are not typically recommended."

Someone asked what was my most embarrassing moment. I made something up, because I was too embarrassed to say.. Ever happen to you?

NPR did a little montage of right-wing comments on the new birth control no-copay policy. One chick said "If they're going to provide free birth control and free abuse counselling, why not a free mani-pedi?"
Are you serious?

I'm concept mapping the nervous system and want a really big set of Crayola colored
pencils. In other news, my nerdiness has reached an all time high.

Taught my first creative writing class, drank so much coffee I was shaking and got chalk all over my black dress. Mission: weird poet teacher, accomplished.

A recent police study found that you're much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run....

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. -Ralph Waldo Emerson