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Monday, October 29, 2012

Noisy, Aggressive, Smelly, Greedy, Entitled, Rude, Unapologetic

Frat Boys.....

Oh, no, I mean Rudy.

He is so obnoxious.  He's loud and clumsy - he's a bull in a china shop.  And he's jealous and possessive, yet he growls a lot when we try to pet him.  When he's cranky or anxious and wants to play, he follows me around and bites me.  He knows he isn't supposed to eat our food or the cats' food, but he tries to every chance he gets.  He makes lots of loud noises that sound like old men sleeping, or teamsters, or passed out frat boys.  His farts are horribly offensive.  I mean they permeate the whole room and literally smell like shit.  Tonight, I smelled one all of a sudden, and I had to check the rug he was lying on to make sure he hadn't shat on it.  He hadn't.  It was just a fart.

Oh the joys of dog parenting that I've waited so long for.  I think the problem is, I should have gotten a dog a long ass time ago.  A long ass time ago, I wasn't as much of a germaphobe, or as OCD about certain things, and I was more patient and tolerant, I wasn't as much as a grumpy old person as I am now.

But, he's funny.  And he's goofy.  And he's Rudy.

But I'm thinking I need to get beano for dogs.  I mean really. It smelled like shit.

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